The Itchy Tits Sacrifice

This sweater feels like hay bales and sandpaper, but what is comfort compared to wearing something of great beauty? And oh how Perry Ellis nailed the chunky, yet fitted sweater look of the 80s.

Bettina wore this to her CSA board meeting today, and as the only female and non-farmer on the board, she found it difficult to endure without scratching her boobies. But you know, what I like to call "The Rodin Le Penseur Pose" always works well in those situations. Pretend you're thinking hard on something, and then move your arm subtly in a windshield-wiper motion. Works every time.

Bettina loves the winter, itchy sweaters, and Brussel sprouts. I can't even tell you how tired I am of the smell of them. She keeps bringing leftovers to me. My house smells like stale toots, and it's not me. I swear.